The first step, I thought is to try marital counseling. When I suggested that I'd like to try it to see if we could develop a closer relationship, he snapped at me.
"There is nothing wrong with our relationship!"
And then he walked into the garage and slammed the door.
Proof that he is ok with the way the relationship is.
Reinforcement to me that the relationship will never change. I need to change the relationship.
There is no fix, there is only out.
This has been eating away at me.
When times are good (Fantasyland) I like him. He makes me laugh.
He's generally a nice guy.
His mother abruptly left him when he was a young boy. (She later returned, but died a few years after that. I think I'm afraid my leaving will also be seen by him as more abandonment from another woman in his life.)
He's got a few physical impairments from the accident and needs my help to do a few things.
He might see my leaving as a sign of rejection for his impairments.
He needs me.
How can I leave him? I can't give up on him, poor guy.
Why in the hell are all my excuses for staying centered around making sure he's happy and taken care of??
What about my own needs?
Somebody please tell me to shut up with the excuses.
“Getting out is not giving up on someone
when staying is giving up on yourself.”
Thank you Tom.I needed that.
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